Gorgeous day.

We are all so interconnected, if you're on the internet that is. My mil is afraid to purchase anything online or do online banking, she does have Facebook though, so there are some people out there who choose their ways to be connected.

Facebook, wow. I remember a friend in university telling me to sign up for it, and I did to be her 'friend'. I remember asking what the purpose was, and she replied it's just fun. I recall when I did sign up it was a lot more popular in the states then here in the northern america aka Canada, and that I had about 2 friends who were using it back then (circa 2006). 

Sidenote : I just realized Facebook has been added to the dictionary whilst typing, only if capitalized. 

Since I began using Facebook it has grown, as I am sure you've noticed into this huge thing. I can state that I've lost some friendships over Facebook, found and strengthened others that might not have had that opportunity otherwise. The ones that are lost are hard, was it that we communicated too much, knew too much about one another? Who the heck knows. I have had the opportunity to complete many many more weddings shooting photos, due in most part to the accessibility, recommendations and connections of Facebook ( purple umbrella :).

As a new mama it has been super helpful for me just to not feel so freaking stir crazy and feel somewhat in touch with my old friends, new ones and their everyday lives. I can't leave my home to be there with them, so it is nice to see what is going on in their world.

A few weeks ago now I saw a post someone had made on a friends wall-via the lovely newsfeed feature. This post turned out to be on someone's wall who had unfortunately just passed away after a long and difficult battle with cancer. She was 36, had a 7 year old and her life was still so young, so new. She had a lot of time to go. Then it was cut short, and now people were posting condolences via her Facebook page. So bizarre to me, this new way of mourning. 

What hit home in a huge way was that she was only roughly 10 years older then me and the subsequent slideshow of images that could be seen showed her loving her everyday beautiful life. Cottage pictures of her snuggling with her little one and just taking in her everyday life, treasuring every beautiful moment when she could have chosen a very different way to face her everyday life. She lived a lot in the time since her diagnosis and seized every freaking moment and turned it into a memory. I am sure there were moments of everything in between; But at least once a day she seized the beauty of her day and her family.

We have days that suck, that are hard. where babes don't sleep the night before and wake up screaming every 2 hours, nursing until you're dry then wanting a bottle as well, only to wake up 2 hours later to repeat (friday, saturday and sunday night). 

But the days are gorgeous, the days are beautiful. The smile that greets me in the morning from paul and from my roe (even tiny d), they're beautiful. The kiss I get every morning before paul heads off to work makes me feel loved and secure. The knowledge that every day is new and every day is a new opportunity, a new memory, a new secret moment that will never happen again. 

Monroe is 7 months old today, and my life has changed so very much and I am so thankful for the gorgeous, beautiful and handsome men in my lives, who amke my everyday more beautiful in the midst of all the crap. That one grin from ear to ear, that one hug can get me through, heck even those 5 hours of sleep can suffice.

Go find your gorgeous moment today.

little teeths

Monroe now has 2 sharp spiky front bottom teeth, and some swollen and menacing looking gums. This has caused some changes in him.

Very noticeable changes.

Now I know/knew that babes get cranky when there poor little gums are torn to shreds by their pushy teeth. I did not realize how much it can change me as a mama.

There was one night last week (maybe thursday or friday?) where Monroe woke up and screamed non-stop from 3 am-5 am. Eventually after lots of soothing we gave him some pain medicine and his daddy rocked him to sleep in the lazy boy. There were a few other nights that week with non-stop crying, screaming, bawling, that left both Paul & I questioning where his next tooth was, all this fuss must be over something right?

The thing is that teeth seem to be like much of the growth, physically, mentally, emotionally that we go through during our transition into parenthood. It hurts so much. Then it wanes and ceases all together, then flares up, then is a dull ache and so on and so forth. The teeth come down, shrink back up, break through, grow taller and longer.

Some days I feel like being a mother was/is my calling, my life's duty, my purpose. Truth be told some days I want to just be alone and sew or read or knit or some other activity I find relaxing (I am finding my outlets) and I feel like maybe this wasn't my calling.

A person I know was recently discussing with me how she did not feel quite right constantly at home with her children, nor was she content away working full-time. A part-time work schedule worked perfectly for her in her situation. I have yet another friend who stays home full time with her 2 little ones and she told me once that she doesn't ever want to look back and think about what she missed out on due to working, and that she'd never look back and think I shouldn't have stayed home with them. Everyone's view on motherhood and staying home vs. working is different. This leaves me a little confused as to what society think I should do. I know that this is a common issue for every mother out there, and I have no answers just typing out loud.

The thing about teeth, is you don't quite know what they'll end up looking like, will they need braces, fillings? Will they wear down with age, will they not show up until a year old +?

Teething this past week has been tough for my roe, growing as a mama has been tough this week too. I am starting to feel so "coming out the other side on a freaking rainbow" some days, and other days the sads seep in and I find myself feeling isolated and a little alone.


To me motherhood is not something that will pass quickly, that much like teething and something that will be shifted, molded and work on for years and years to come. I'll let you know how we make out :)